Mother to my brother and sister?

Issue courtesy of louis: ^{How do I be a mother and sister to my brother?}

My brother is 11 and we were very close before I had to take guardianship of him because of our moms alcohol/drug abuse. I’m finding it really hard because he gets upset at me now because I’m having to set rules and be the “parent”. He says that I’ve changed ansd he doesn’t listen to/respect me or my rules and I really don’t have that many.

How do I be a good “mother” to him yet still also be his sister as I don’t want to lose that

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Best answer:

Answer by apey37

You need to go back to being his sister, but without telling him, keep your rules and let him know that you are just trying to keep him safe and that you don’t want him to end up like mom. If you feel that he is starting to get out of control tell him and let him know you are just worried, big sisters are allowed to be worried too.

Answer by ♥Lyssie♥

im not a parent, but i understand your situation. om 14 and my older brother has legal custody of me and has for 4 years now. anyway, i was the same way as your brother. i didnt listen to him or respect him as a parent at first either. but when i broke a rule or did something wrong and he had to punish me, he stuck to the punishment now matter how much i fought it. he didnt bend just to get me to stop. eventually i realised he was serious and if i didnt do what i was told or did something i was to no for, i was gonna get in trouble. it hit me like “whoa! he’s not kidding.” and the i started to listen to him and respect his rules. you have to be the same way as Kris or else your brother is not gonna take you seriously.

you also have to figure out how to balance the parent thing with the big sister thing. that was something my brother is very good at. we still do the same things we did before, the brother/sister stuff. random stuff like going to rent a dvd or drive an hour to go the best ice cream place around, or get friends over and play rockband for hours. but only after he makes sure my homework is done. thats the kind of balance that you’re gonna need cuz you dont wanna lean too hard one way or the other.

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Mother to my brother and sister?